Teacher

Sometimes i don't even know why i am a teacher. The funny thing is before i became a teacher, i dressed how i wanted to, spoke how i wanted to, act however i wanted to. But ever since becoming a teacher, i feel like i have changed. Little by little, i start to see myself as someone who influence people around me, so what i wear, how i spoke and how i acted mattered. It matters that i stand firm to truths and to remember to keep to values that would make society a better place. Life becomes not all about me anymore. ( Still not perfect obviously )

Will i be a teacher for the rest of my life? I do not know. I wonder if i'll ever do design again. But i am certain God has His ways with me, and sometimes i won't learn certain things if i am not where i am now. He is always preparing us for whatever is next, and boy i am sure He would be the best coach, and yes, to even the most rebellious or proud a student. He would know how to discipline and humble so we may be ready to successfully be obedient to His calling of us, that would be of great blessings and wonder.

I remember in my final year of Uni in Sydney studying fashion design. Treasuring what He thought me while i skateboard with Him, He teaches me a valuable lesson on falling, we are bound to fall, but how else will we learn to fly? We learn from our mistakes, its good to do research and to learn and watch from those who were successful from the past, but still , we have to try, we have to make mistakes, we have to get back up, and we have to move on forward. 

Don't think i did very well in my final year, but the Lord was kind, i won competitions, somehow i felt the Lord truly gave it to me, but not because of how good/holy i am, because looking back, i was not really that good at all, but perhaps its because i trusted Him, and was remembered of the scene of Peter walking on water, and He had to fix His eyes on Jesus or he will drown in his circumstances and storms .. i remember now knowing what to do after i graduated, i thought perhaps God would sent me to be a missionary because wouldn't that be a worthy calling, look at people like Brother Yun, how amazing is His life, and how my life look so superficial compared. But now i have learned that, we are all allotted a measure of faith. I guess i remembered praying for God to sent me wherever He wanted me to go.

He wonderfully gave me a scholarship to Italy, everything looked a mess, but everything worked out! I can still remember it and it was a magical moment. He just put everything in place, and reshuffled things to work, it was a beautiful mess! Its so funny how things could change just overnight, and suddenly from thinking nothing is happening, to wow, thanks God :)

After that i had 6-7months before Italy, and that was hard, i wondered if God would really allow it to happen or if perhaps it might not happen. I guess that period of waiting, taught me patience, and i also received my first taste of teaching during that time, because i went to help up to teach at a myanmar refugee. Perhaps i felt like a refugee myself and therefore knew how they felt, just waiting, just floating.

I remember touching down the city of Florence, all i can think about was how beautiful it was! And i even had a really cool place to live! God always always provided the best!!!!. Heck the time spend doing a Master's program was more like a holiday than anything!

Sometimes i wonder what i did to receive such blessings, and i guess nothing. Its not about me, He just like to bless His daughters who decided that Father knows best :) While i was thinking of wanted to be a missionary in some smelly place, God placed me in the most beautiful city in the world!:D, I did learn to sing hymns and read the bible more thoroughly there though. I did not think that actually God will want to bless us physically with wonderful beautiful thing, because i thought that Christian life is one of hardship and difficulties. But maybe i am wrong. Perhaps God truly want to always give His best to His children, but will we let Him be our provider all in all?

I do believe that this season of my life now looks nothing but glamorous and it has nothing i can boast about. I can't say i am a Fashion Design who has a label etc, all i can tell people is that i am a teacher, teaching teenagers. haha. i feel like people are just going to say,..oh... teacher... okay.... I guess God has His was in humbling me, and these are the times i would learn so much of what i need to learn. 

I hope to remain brave in Him, to always be strengthen, to lean on His faithfulness. And to trust in His goodness.

With all my hopes and dreams, i know the Lord would not withhold truly that which is good for His daughters. Will we allow Him to write our story? :) 

Sometimes its hard to fix my eyes above. but Blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord :D and so i must!. Thought things around may not look like it will work out for good, God has promised that He will work all things good for those whom love Him :)

WARRIOR :)

The Lord will fight for you and you need only to be still." - Exodus 14:14

One day there would be a man who would fight for my heart, because he will be like my Heavenly Father in heaven. I know i only need be still :)

It is.

It is safer to walk with Christ in the storm, than to walk without Christ in sunshine.

restlessness.

sometimes i feel utterly restless and hoping for some big thing to happen in my life. While life just drifts by slowly.. and its as though it is a daily surrender of my pen. As though God is saying... Na -a! you don't take the pen from my hand, im going to write down a beautiful delicious , superbly amazing recipe for you. If you were to write it yourself you're gonna get yourself a Hamburger. TRUST ME.

and i hesitantly go... are you sure Lord. like how long must i wait, im sure i can create a pretty decent meal. and He is like " TRUST ME i made the Ingredients i know how to make beauty. So leave it to me hun, im gonna turn your tomatoes and carrots into something amazing! and im like " Seriously Lord, you can make something amazing out of tomatoes and carrots.." .. for real?

Noelle, I totally turn a Shepherd's boy to King, a boy abandoned by His brothers to be the Ruler, i gave the loner Ruth a Boaz, and the orphan Esther to be Queen. I can do what i want, you know what you need to do, have faith and trust me. None of them could have stick through if they did not truly TRUST in me. and Lived by Faith. Do it Noelle. TRUST ME.

I know your deepest desires, I know your deepest needs. I and only I can satisfy the longing of your soul.

I am forever on time and i never build anything in vain.

TRUST ME.

must learn to be a good steward.

urgh.. i must realize

1) i have more than enough clothes and should stop shopping. and shop only if my clothes disintegrate or all get full of holes and stuff because honestly i DO have more than enough. And should not bother about clothes anymore.

2) that if i can save, i should. And not be so lavish or extravagant on my spending on meals and food and such. Try to buy only what is necessary, reasonable and healthy!

3) thing more of others, to bless others. to give to the church and missions and such.

4) be a good steward with my money. my time. talent. and all God has given me.

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im enjoying my facebook fast. I think i'll stick to it, and continue to be strict and firm with myself and prioritize well.

God, please lead and guide me, show me , and grant me opportunities to be a good steward in all you have placed in my hands. amen..

APRIL 25!

Its already April. The Lord is GOOD !
We must always look back and remember all the goodness He has bestowed upon us.
Our hope would increase as we see what the gift of faith He has generously given us could do!
As we rely on Him as our Only Trust. He shows us, He is the Only thing we do need to trust and hope in.

There are times i look at my imperfection. and It humbles me and shows me how ignorant i am when i judge others or have a critical mind. There are much of me that needs to improve, and i know that it would be a working progress, a life long working progress. A daily dying to self, and Listening to the Spirit. Its not easy, but im determine to always give my best! To run this race with endurance!

He is full of lovingkindness and tender mercies.

Neighbour.

Today was an eventful day.

As i was driving to work, my left front tyre burst. So i decided to stop at a parking slot. I proceeded to asking the custom officer nearby if there were any mechanics nearby, He did not look that friendly. Though he came back with a friend, and they helped me changed my tyre :). 3 malay government servants helping me. It really humbled me to never judge a person by race, position or status.

After they were done , i told them " Thank you so much , i'll remember you forever ! ". They also told me to go to a nearby shop area where there are mechanics. I listen to their advice and arrive to the area without any difficulties. There i met a lady who is in charge of the place. She speaks fluent english and have a very unique and exotic strong face!, She was the kindest, she even called a cab for me to sent me to work, it was such great and helpful service! :)

At work, when it was time to clock out. I asked a few colleagues if they would give me a lift to the mechanic as it was nearby. To my great disappointment they were all reluctant to help me. It made me feel not so very loved. Though i've earned never to expect anything from anyone. Especially and especially those who have a lot and are more than capable of helping because they are the ones who won't know what it feel like to want help nor be willing enough to go out of their way to help.

Called the cab and arrived at the mechanic. She was so lovely and she also gave me discount. An honest boss that is helpful and kind. I do pray for all these Lovely Good Samaritans. That God may pursue them and that they may come to know His love . They have also thought me to be a good samaritan when the opportunity presents itself.

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“Which of these three do you think was a neighbor to the man who fell into the hands of robbers?”

The expert in the law replied, “The one who had mercy on him.”

Jesus told him, “Go and do likewise.”

Luke 10:36-37

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Mercy - compassionate treatment of those in distress 

the fullstop to all my choices.

I TRUST MY GOD ! He has been forever faithful and forever loving and forever GOOD!!!
HE blows my mind always! i am waiting on Him forever, cos He the BOMB! :P

unworthy.

sometimes i see my own faults and it looks ugly. i wished i was better, i wished i was more loving more patient , kinder, softer, gentler. I guess, i'll always be learning and realizing my own faults would keep me in lowliness, the best position to be for a Christian. Sometimes i feel so unworthy for all the blessing God has given me because im so flawed. How can i be deserving. i must have done something right i guess... He breaks my heart with His patience, love, kindness and gentleness towards me. Thank you lord for your unfailing love. amen.

Abraham and Isaac.

The kingdom of God is within you. We shall dwell in the house of the Lord forever.

How wonderful it is when God becomes our primary focus on everything! How necessary it is to lay down everything at His feet. It doesn't happen without a fight. My natural tendencies are to grasp and keep, to hold tightly, to tell God " this is what i want, i think it is good, give it to me, i am waiting " How foolish is this thought and way. We must be humbly give our desires up to God. He's thoughts are not our thoughts nor our ways His. Trust the Lord, and lean not on your own understanding.

Everyday will begin the battle,

But we never can prove the delights of His love

Until all on the altar we lay;

For the favor He shows, for the joy He bestows,

Are for them who will trust and obey.

unknown.

im actually enjoying this season. Not out there on display, or for show. But hidden, changing, learning, growing, like a bud before it blooms? i don't always need to be out there, gaining attention, drawing eyes on me, being a somebody in this world. As long as i delight myself in God, i am content :)

may this 2013 be one special one :)

life.

sometimes the only way to learn is through mistakes. I would say they are the most painful of teachers, but, boy do you learn :(

get up, dust of your feet, and know, you are made stronger through it all.

,

so much of show. so much of opinions. so much of the senses. so much for the eyes to see. for the ears to hear. for the tongue to taste. so much out there that may turn us to look upon just the things visible.

may we remember, there is the invincible that governs all that is visible.
guard your heart above all things.
May your heart and mind be of the things of Christ.

2013

God must have every portion of my life.

" Thou my best thought by day or by night,
Waking or sleeping Thy presence my light "

stumble in darkness i might so long my life is not yield to Christ. So let me cast of darkness and yield myself to Christ in submission.

i know easier said than done, but i must be done how ever slow the process might be. God is working out  and perfecting the faith of those who trust in Him, and conforming us into His image, He has His ways and timing. In Him we must Trust :) He is Loving, and he cares. He won't give us more than we can handle or bear. Life is found in Christ. Walk in the light as a citizen of the heavenly.

Thank you Lord for everything :)Thank you for loving and protecting me. and knowing that i am weak. and that we need your care constantly.